pop to the pop to the pop pop pop

i like popcorn, but i don't like it every day. i like it with butter and salt, or with caramel. i don't really like the cheese kind. i'll eat microwave popcorn, but movie popcorn is better, unless it's old movie popcorn, all broken little pieces and shit. i mean, i like fresh popcorn. who doesn't? every friday, the cafe at work pops fresh popcorn and you can have some, free. i'll usually get some. it's good, but not great, which is weird because it's fresh. hmm. well, it's fresh popped... maybe it's not fresh kernels. the best popcorn is fresh-fresh. first, it's made from fresh kernels and second, you need to get it right out of the popper. fresh-fresh with butter and salt. or, alternately, caramel corn. fresh caramel corn is good, of course, but caramel is like shellac and when you pour it over the popcorn, the combination isn't exactly popcorn anymore. it's more like candy, and the shellac keeps the underlying corn in a freshesque state. like petrified food, caramel corn is forever preserved in delicious edibility.