16 October 2017


i am sorted.

i am

i am feather.
i am freedom.
i am air.

it is
sixty-five degrees.
it is
shadows under trees.

it is autumn.
i am breathing.
i am there.


in case you couldn't tell, this is a song. here is me singing it to the beat of the blinker: sorted

26 September 2017

a couple questions about kneeling during the anthem

does kneeling or sitting during the national anthem disrespect the flag, the country, people who fought for our freedom? what constitutes disrespect? can you disrespect only part of a faceless entity? is a country a faceless entity? can you disrespect the flag and respect veterans at the same time? does different etiquette apply if you are live at the event or at home watching the event? does different etiquette apply according to a person's role? is this a free country where it is our right to behave as we please as long as we aren't breaking any laws? does behaving against a common standard of etiquette constitute a protest? does behaving against a common standard of etiquette constitute an effective protest? what is an effective protest? can a protest accomplish a goal greater than mere recognition of an issue? does disrespecting what someone else holds dear get their attention in an effective way? does disrespecting what someone else holds dear further the cause of unity? when i say disrespecting what someone else holds dear do you assume i'm talking about disrespecting the flag? which is more disrespectful to all that is USA - not standing up during the national anthem or not standing up for what you believe? can action without context be meaningful? can protesters control the change that protest brings? can protest bring change? is getting angry over someone's protest a protest within itself? is anger a protest within itself? is anger productive?

20 September 2017

outwitted (2017)

i wanted to share myself with you
by telling you about the groups that i'm in
and then i heard you call the people in those groups idiots
and watched you treat them cruelly
and i lost my nerve

i wanted to share myself with you
by telling you my beliefs
and then i heard you disparage those beliefs
for the sake of tolerance
and i lost my nerve

i wanted to share myself with you
by telling you about the books that i read
and then i heard you call the ideas in those books stupid
and watched you treat them with contempt
and i lost my nerve

i wanted to share myself with you
by telling you about the places i go
and then i saw you marginalize those places
for the sake of inclusion
and i lost my nerve

i wanted to share myself with you
in the hopes that we could find
some common ground for love
but i felt your disdain
for everything that is me
so i lost my nerve

09 September 2017

to live in a grove of cedars

to live in a grove of cedars
and watch the day come up
sunlight strained through cedar boughs
hot coffee in your cup

to live in a grove of cedars
needles between your toes
and a wee grey cat to follow you
everywhere you go

to live in a grove of cedars
and work in the woods all day
ensuring apparent wildness 
where other people play

to live in a grove of cedars
with bob white for a friend
and a whipoorwill on your windowsill
when day is at its end

to live in a grove of cedars
and when the sun goes down
the lightning bugs come out to play
across the mossy ground

to live in a grove of cedars
and breathe cedar-scented air
while stars pass by in a cool night sky
you sleep with no worldly cares

21 August 2017

obligatory eclipse post

i don't have any pics to share, but you can see pics anywhere.
or everywhere.
or here and there.

what i have is memory, but how long will that be with me?
will i forget this thing i saw, when i am old, a granny-ma?

the most amazing part of it was not the end or start of it,
nor the middle (quite delightful),
nor the afters (very brightful).
no, the most amazing part was knowing right when it would start,
and knowing also when it'd end
(when the moon'd move on again)
and then to watch it all unfold just the way that we'd been told
it would!

the eclipse was amazing. where i work, we had a party with free food and eclipse glasses, and we all gathered outside and watched it happen. we wore the glasses until TOTALITY! when we took them off and looked directly at the black hole moon with the bright white corona busting out the sides like a squashed double-stuff oreo while this phone app counted down to the second we needed to put the glasses back on to watch as the on-the-move moon moved on.

as amazing as it was to watch, the most amazing thing by far was that it happened precisely as predicted. i mean, they can't even predict rain when it's literally actually raining, but they can predict the precise movements of these ginormous heavenly bodies.

also, the corona was pretty damn sweet.

16 August 2017

TMI -- totes to the max!

and then she goes, you need to get a colonoscopy, and i am all like, c'mon doc, but then she was like, just do it, so i was all oooookay if i haaaave to.

cause those things are a pain in the ass.



anyhoo, i didn't want to do it, so i put it off a whole year, and went for my annual physical, and went through the whole conversation again.


then, one day, i saw a commercial for this: cologuard.

colonoscopy at home!


i messaged my doc. that's right, messaged her. my doc works for vandy and they have a slick messaging system. anyway, i messaged my doc and asked, what about this cologuard - can it be a substitute for a colonoscopy? she was all, good question and yes it sure can and in fact we have an even better test here at the lab, you can come pick it up during regular business hours.


getting to the doctor's office during regular business hours is a royal pain but not quite as royal as a colonoscopy. like, a colonoscopy is the king of pain and getting to the doc at midday is the princess.

so i went on over there today, found a place to park, went in and asked at the information desk where could i get the "mail order colonoscopy thing". the info desk guy was all, riiiiight.... the colonoscopy department is over there. so i walked over there and asked for "that kit thingie where you can do the test at home" and the guy at the desk was all [blank stare].

so then i had to get directions to my doc's office because this place is hella mazey. i wound my way through the building to her office and the lab across the hall... and there i managed to ask for the "home fecal testing kit" #GROSS. the one lady at the desk had to ask another lady and the first lady literally said she forgot what i wanted and so i had to say it again, "home fecal testing kit" #GROSS. but that second lady, she just reaches in the desk and hands me an envelope.


it's like 4"x6" and you can feel this tube thing inside.



i'll just stop here. this is probably already more than you wanted to know.

14 August 2017

it really doesn't get more serious than the bossman.

there are a lot of really serious things going on the world right now. if you are reading this like 50 years from now - which would be 2067 if you are really bad at math - then maybe you aren't aware of these haps, or maybe there are more serious haps in 2067 that make ol' 2017 pale by comparison. whatever. point is, for us now in this day and time, things are serious.

do you have google in 2067? well then, use it, bygod! google you up some 2017. .....see? serious. much more serious than all the things i blather on about... groceries, running, clothes. even when i wax philosophical, it's pretty shallow. it's not like i don't know that.

thing is, attempting to articulate my opinions on complex subjects in a small space such as this isn't going to end well. "small" or maybe flat, one dimensional, words only. there's no body language here, no facial expressions, no nuance. it won't end well because without me to interpret them, my words will be looking for someone else to do that job and they'll look around and find you, and in their eagerness to get interpreted, they won't be too picky about the interpretation you come up with.

that's just too dangerous.

so, instead, we will talk about bossman cookies & pies.

bossman: https://www.facebook.com/BOSSMAN-COOKIES-AND-PIES-130512163642247/

the bossman's truck is often parked at a place where i sometimes start my runs. so, i see the bossman's decal-emblazoned pickup a few times per week. today, i saw it, and my mind made up a song, and then for the next half hour or so, as i ran around the sidewalks, this totally made up song ran around and around and around my brain. i mean, totally made up out of the spare thoughts flotsaming and jetsaming around my wee tiny brain, and i mean, "around my brain" as in "on an endless freaking loop".

ENDLESS LOOP. people. that is serious.

here is the lyric:

bossman, bossman, bossman cookies and pies!
bossman, bossman, bossman cookies and pies!
pies and cookies from the bossman -
cookies and pies the same!
he's got the pies and the cookies,
and the bossman is his name!

and, for your listening pleasure: bossman song