hello. yeah, it's been a while. not much, how 'bout you?

well, lifeguard training is over.

I PASSED!

my classmates were a dozen teenagers. one seventeen years old, one sixteen, ten fifteen, and me. three years ago when i took the class, the student body makeup was about the same, but there were two significant differences: then, i was one of two in the class who had a smartphone, and none of the class had a twitter account. now, i'm pretty sure at least 8 of the 12 had smartphones, and at least as many had twitter accounts. so, i guess that says something about technology and social media.

the first time i took lifeguarding, i was sixteen, and i took it very seriously. the second time, i was much (much!) older and i took it very seriously. from what i could tell, all my classmates both times took the class very seriously, also.

the third time i took lifeguarding was this time, and again, i took it very seriously. from what i could tell, my classmates did not. well, some did, but some showed up late. or, didn't show at all. i personally witnessed many incorrectly performed maneuvers. and probably most concerning was that somehow, the instructor allowed this one kid to take like two hours to finish the written test and then she allowed that same kid four chances to success at the practicum. oh, wait, that was four chances the first time. THE FIRST TIME. that's right, she let him take the practicum twice.

look, i don't care. it's her signature on the card, vouching for our mad lifesaving skillz. what i want to know is, if it's this easy to pass, why the hell am i taking it so seriously?

i guess it's possible that my classmates weren't taking the class as seriously as i, either of the first two times. it's possible that i was distracted by my own deafening seriousity. it's entirely possible that i am an insufferable prick. but frankly, knowing myself, i have to say that's a bit far fetched. i mean, sure, i'm a prick, but i am totally sufferable.

if i was into dot-connecting, i'd say there's a connection to be made between these kids' lack of gravitas and the whole "smart phone possession with social media participation" thing. there's something different with kids today than three years ago, and a lot different between these kids and the kids of my youth.

okay, imma just say it: they don't work hard and take class seriously because they don't have to. they're entitled because people just give shit to them. i mean, c'mon. they have freaking smartphones, for godssakes.

i have personally witnessed a professional life SAVING instructor giving an actual practicum allow literally multiple chances and multiple complete cockups that would (in reality) have NOT SAVED ANYONE.

why don't adults work harder? they're all afraid the kids will say nasty things about about them on social media, band together, and marginalize their authority into complete unimportance. grown-ups are so afraid of being non-essential that, in an effort to remain essential, they give away the store, which IS THE VERY BEHAVIOUR that makes them non-essential.

and that, my friends, is irony.